Ain't It Funny How Things Work Out?

First of all, let me begin another hilariously written, beautifully edited, incredibly memorable and fucking frolicking post by congratulating da homeys.  'dem Eagles chewed on some Gator ass over this weekend to earn a spot in the CWS in Omaha.  Way to go USM!  

Okay, now that's out of the way let me move on here.  While at the liquor store the other night a couple of girls were attempting to buy some bottles of wine.  The clerk was checking the i.d. of one and noticed something odd.

He asked the girl, who was a redhead, why she looked hispanic in her i.d.  The girl said she picked up the wrong i.d. at a bar they just left.  Obviously lying, the babe began to tap the counter nervously while the dumbass clerk kept asking her questions.  He's making a move on this chick okay?

The other girl offered her i.d. instead and said she would buy the liquor.  So the clerk took her i.d. and looked at it.  He noticed that she was only 20 and not 21.  She said she knew that, duh, but was hoping he wouldn't look at the birthdate.  Holy fucking dumbasses Batman!

Then the redhaired, green eyed Messican asked me if I'd buy the wine.  I said sure but they'd have to buy me a bottle too.  The clerk, slightly pissed by now, said as long as the girls left the store and property it was okay by him.  So the two skanks drove across the street and waited for me there.

I run across the street and give the two lame broads their wine and change.  I decided I didn't want their fucking gratitude so I passed on the free bottle, but I did make a deal with them.  In exchange for their phone numbers I would help them again.

After I got their numbers I went back across the street.  I walked into the liquor store and straight to the wormy little clerk.  I gave him their phone numbers and told him they wanted him to call them.  He was so thankful that he gave me the liquor that I originally went there to buy.  End of story.  Cheers!